Trolls, Goblins, and Ogres: How To Stop Online Stalkers

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An Example Troll

I missed one tweet asking about our previous project back in February. Somehow, that equated to me walking into downtown Jerusalem and reading aloud from a Dan Brown novel. Because of this perceived slight, our troll tried starting a Twitter crusade with me starring as the Anticrhist.

I won’t link to her feed, but I’ll share with you my favorite tweet:

“BJ medndelson (the kickcancerblogger) has just put a virus on his site so that you can’t email him with cancer stories..what a insult to us!”

That’s right. The troll says I am so evil that I was sending viruses to cancer survivors.

At the time of this alleged virus sending, Thebrandonshow.com was offline being converted into Soap Box Included. Making her comments so absurd they were hilarious.

Learn to laugh at your trolls and make sure to never acknowledge them. I eventually saw her Twitter stream after she flipped out on my email auto-responder. I promptly blocked her.

An Example Ogre

Barb sent me email and posted comments like the following every day that my wife and I were on the road for the 1 in 8 Foundation back at the start of this year. I never did hear from her on the weekends, making me think hating me from her cubicle was how she passed the time at work.

“Your are such a scam it is not funny…begging for money made out in your name is not a charitable act…you are just scamming everybody to pay for your trip [...] You will be exposed…”

Funny, not “he’s putting a virus on his website and sending it to cancer survivors” funny, but funny in the “Barb created an alternate reality ala the Matrix where only she knows the truth and will stop at nothing to expose it” kind of way.

Then the comedy ended and Barb’s emails and comments would continue to get more serious and threatening. We’ll address how to stop an ogre in a moment. But first, let’s meet our goblin …

An Example Goblin

Goblins are my least favorite because they’re not funny. They’re the digital equivalent of being forced to listen to the Emergency Broadcast System’s alert for the rest of your days.

Goblins like to leave lengthy emails and blog comments that often focus on three key points:

1. How much cooler / better off they are than you.

2. That you should quit what you’re doing and get a real job

3. Crap all over you by pretending to ask a question and then answer it themselves. Or alternatively, saying something like “I was just going to write a post about this.”

Think of it like this: Trolls insult your mother, Goblins insult you.

So How Do You Stop Your Stalkers?

1. Trolls

People are going to say stupid crap about you online. It happens to everyone. But you don’t have to take it . Ignore the trolls, don’t reply to them, and block them if needed. They will go away.

2. Goblins

Unlike trolls, they’ll stick around  to needle you every chance they get. I have zero tolerance for this, so I delete the comments and block them immediately. If they pop up elsewhere that I’ve done a post, I’ll ask to have their comments removed.

You need to watch out for Goblins. Goblins take every opportunity they can to make you look bad, and they’ll do it everywhere they can. If they slip through and other people see their comment before you get to them, address them, and then block them.

That’s the advantage you have over Goblins. You’re the publisher. You control the debate. Feel free to make them look dumb before blocking their ability to bug you further.

3. Ogres

Unlike trolls, they won’t go away over time. Unlike goblins, they’re not satisfied with making you look bad. Ogres want to take you down .

Barb was our ogre. There was no reason for her to be after us, we did everything by the book and were in constant contact with an attorney, an accountant, and the foundation to make sure everything was done right.

We stated this many times, and she continued to harass us. It got to the point where she was writing in to the foundation, filed a complaint against them, and then threatened to call the police on Amanda and I when we returned from our trip.

So one day I had enough. I realized there was one way to stop an Ogre (and in a way, let the Goblins know that if they cross the line you have an option to get rid of them too.)

How To Stop The Ogre

1. Out your Ogre: Do a post sharing with your readers the Ogre’s comments towards you and identify them. Did you notice our ogre was the only one I addressed by name?

2. Write an email to your Ogre, eventually they’ll screw up and leave their email around, asking them to cease and desist any and all electronic communications with you. Make sure you use the words “cease and desist”. Those three words are very important because …

3. Write an email immediately after you send the email above to the Ogre’s service provider. You can find this by identifying the IP address in their blog comments or emails to you.

4. If the problem continues, such as the case with Barb, who continued to threaten us after I emailed her and copied my attorney on the message, make sure you indicate your plans to follow-up with the police. It’s easy to find someones location once you have their IP address. And it’s even easier to find the nearest police department to them.

Between the threat of police action or having their internet service cut off, your Ogre will go away. Bonus: You’ll scare most of your Goblins away too.

5. If they don’t, and if at any point your safety feels threaten, I encourage you to contact your local police department and speak to an officer.

Trolls go away, Goblins require a plan, and Ogres must be dealt with as soon as they show up. Ignore the trolls, respond and then block the Goblin, and immediately report the Ogre to their service provider (and the police if you feel your safety is in danger.)

Be aggressive in shutting these people down. It sends the message that you’re not going to take their crap or anyone else’s. You shouldn’t have to.

Tagged as: Blog Commenting Blue Print, Goblins, Ogres, ow To Build A Better Blog, Spam, Trolls