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Enough of this shit!
Why is it that I can’t get through one article or blog post without the author going:
“Twitter is a place to share what you had for breakfast.”
“Twitter is for more than just sharing what you had for breakfast.”
“Twitter is for ordering omlets, hash browns, but you’ll have to get the orange juice some place else. Oh look! Lists!”
“Did Twitter murder CNN’s Glen Beck and replace him with an evil android that now stars on Fox News? We don’t know. We’re just asking the questions.”
I realize and acknowledge that journalism, not the mainstream media, is in a full-on death spiral. One not seen since Menudo. But can we get a new, “Twitter is useless. People are boring” joke?
Any will do.
Really.
It’s tired. The joke is not really that funny, clever, amusing, or witty. It’s lazy. And if any reporter was serious about keeping their job, or any blogger was serious about being read, they would find something new. Pronto.
Because that’s the problem. There’s too much recycled bullshit.
“Oh hey! I saw this photo on Gizmodo! Watch me slap it on my blog and add some text under it. Posting frequently makes me more relevant and keeps the advertisers happy!”
“What? Robert Scoble said something? Oh my god! I must disagree! Surely that will bring me the attention I deserve! Wait a second. I can just mention his name! If I did a blog post that simply said, “Robert Scoble” he would show up and leave a comment. Probably to call me a bitch for taking his name in vain.”
“I love that joke from Family Guy. I mean. I totally hate the show. But I’m going to use the joke. Try and stop me! It’ll make me look so witty and clever.
“What’s that? Gary Vaynerchuck keeps telling people to crush it and cash in on their passion? I will too! But I’ll slightly change the words to make it my own thing. I want you to be balls nasty! And make change through spare change! Take that Gary!”
I read a post the other day, no, it was stupid and I’m not linking to it, where the author was like, “Oh I’ve been blogging for five years and I’ve found that most of us won’t be successful at blogging. It’s too hard. All the megablogs are outposting us, and any niche out there that was available has been taken! We’re doomed! Doomed!”
Fuck that. Seriously. If you think that way, you deserve obscurity. If you’re too lazy to come up with something that inspires people and gets them interested in what you do? You deserve obscurity.
This is not a world for lazy people. Creating material, material worth reading and sharing, is not for lazy people. And you may see some really lazy blogs getting all the attention right now (I don’t need to be specific), but that will pass.
And the only people left standing? You guessed it. It’s not the lazy ones.
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Leave your brain droppings on the wall.
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