About Brandon: The Ballad Of Brandon Mendelson
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My name is Brandon Mendelson, and I am the Director Of Digital Outreach at Wounded Warriors Family Support and Co-author of Dracula And Kittens.
The Book
Dracula And Kittens is a relentless assault on your literary senses. Follow the book’s path to (possible) publication here. I also blog about non-social publishing topics over there.
Contact Brandon
Social: Facebook | Twitter | Google Reader | Digg
Phone: (518) 832-9844
Mail & Email: Click here
*Unless I have met you in person, I won’t accept your Facebook friend request. Why? Read The Facebook Protocol.
How Do I Use Twitter?
Topics: Humor, journalism, social publishing, Magic: The Gathering, The New York Yankees, and random thoughts.
I share funny links and reply to people who comment on them. I won’t re-tweet anything unless it’s amusing or interesting.
I tweet (we need a better verb) often, making @BJMendelson a high volume account. You should put me on a list and not follow directly if that’s a problem.
Hashtags
All updates concerning A Million High Fives part one are followed by #WWFS.
All updates concerning Dracula And Kittens are followed by #draculaandkittens
All updates concerning A Million High Fives part two are followed by #AMHF.
Followers
As awesome as it is having a ton of followers from my time on the Suggested User List (February 2009 to August 2009), I’m attempting to cut that number. People who want to laugh, share funny or interesting things, and read Dracula And Kittens are whom I want to keep. If you’re not interested in that, I don’t want you following me.
If you are following because you are passionate about helping others in need, I encourage you to follow @Hardlynormal instead.
Publication History:
Currently appearing on: The Huffington Post.
Print: Albany Times Union, Albany Student Press, Wonka Vision Magazine, Fourth Coast Entertainment, Northern New York Flair, SUNY Potsdam Racquette, Alfred State Tor Echo, The Times Herald Record, The Photo News, Co-Ed Magazine, College News Magazine, CBS U-Wire.
Online: Class Conflict (Albany Times Union Blog), Mashable, The Huffington Post, Copyblogger, ProBlogger, RWW, Daily Blog Tips, Stepcase LifeHack, The NJ Scene, College Slackers, College 101, Twitips, Blog Critics, ComedyPop, and CBS U-Wire.
About Me
Pre-SBI: The Brandon Show
A lot of you may know me from this, but a few may remember The Brandon Show. No? Here’s a recap:
- Promotional poster from 2002
- Sample radio program from 2004
- “The Stalker Book” sketch from 2006:
You might not remember The Brandon Show because I had OCD. Since I used Microsoft Front Page, I would often take the entire site offline for months to make tweaks. You can see my OCD redesign moments and some older material by clicking on Leighton’s face:
I screwed myself doing this, and that was my first social publishing lesson: Once you’re all set up, don’t move! Most of the “top” blogs are three-years-old, if not older. Longevity matters online.
After this mistake, I became OCD about studying social publishing, which is how this website came about. A quick overview about Soap Box Included can be found here.
Some day, The Brandon Show (all the radio shows, television shows, and other bits of Randy McMurphy nuttiness) will return.
Intro To Mediocrity
I grew up in Monroe, New York. My family moved there to get away from the assholes that inhabit Long Island.
The only thing I kept from the Island was my love for a team that embodies mediocrity, the New York Islanders.
I barely graduated from Monroe-Woodbury Senior High School. I had no commitment to academic success, didn’t want to be there, and hated everyone I went to school with. I did; however, hold the stupid belief that being involved in a lot of extracurriculars would get me into NYU, despite a piss-poor GPA.
Alfred State was the only college that accepted me, and I didn’t even apply there. My Dad sent them an application after I told him I wasn’t applying elsewhere and that other colleges were “bullshit”.
That was a rare moment between my Dad and I because my parents … were not always available. My older sister, Melissa, raised us.
For every good thing Melissa did, my older brother Brad undid. Born dead and later revived through magic, Brad has many issues including severe OCD. His daily routine consists of throwing everything out, putting what’s left away to be thrown out later, going through your stuff, checking the mailbox twenty-seven times, and carrying conversations with himself. If you did anything to disrupt his routine, Brad would get angry, Hulk-angry, so none of us did anything.
Between the parents and Brad, I was functionally retarded until college. Don’t believe me? I’m wearing a New York Mets shirt in the picture to the right. I hate the fucking Mets!
What I Remember From College
Everything I have to say about college can be found in the humor section. At the moment, I’m tied up with Dracula And Kittens, so when that book is finished, you can expect to see more college stories.
5 Things To Do Before I Pull A Hemmingway
1. Keep my promises.
2. Write a New York Times best seller
3. Sleep with Halle Berry
4. Appear on The Colbert Report
5. Not be eaten by bears.
What Am I Doing Now?
In my transition from undergraduate to graduate student, I worked for a syndicated ABC television show and CBS U-Wire. All while taking graduate classes at SUNY Potsdam. Not a great combination.
U-Wire consisted of sitting for six hours each day tagging hundreds of stories from college papers. It sucked, but it was also the perfect job because I barely had coworkers and you could watch all the porn you wanted.
Telecommuting is awesome!
The TV show? It’s something to forget, but hey, it got me in IMDB! I’m halfway to my goal of appearing on television and racking up credits to fill out that page.
Meanwhile, Potsdam wasn’t working out. Since I flunked my LSAT … Wait, flunk is too weak of a word. I bombed my LSAT so hard the walls shook in the scoring center and three law school admissions officers committed suicide in protest. I avoided the GRE after vowing never to kill again.
Faced with limited options, admissions offices really like their bullshit standardized test scores, I went to UAlbany to work toward a Ph.D. in American History.
I attempted to live in Albany after moving from Potsdam, but found out the Times Union wasn’t hiring, and paying for your apartment with a graduate student loan is a really bad idea.
Spooked after a conversation with Dr. Bon Tempo about the job options for a Ph.D. in American History, I wound up leaving UAlbany to travel across America to promote the early detection and prevention of cancer.
Eventually I’ll finish the M.A./ Ph.D program at Ualabny. Until then, I’m writing a book and working for Wounded Warriors Family Support as their Director Of Digital Outreach.
This way, when I have the doctorate, I’m not totally screwed … unless this whole social publishing thing works out. In that case I can pay off the $100,000 student debt and escape to Los Angeles. The liberal arts Ph.D. job market won’t miss me.
